I was the legal one - that was enough for me. It was SHE
I had the ring, I was with HE on occasions, I appear on application forms, name it. Siguro that validated me. So really, while it hurts to know that HE has other people in his life, so long as I assert that I am the wife, the first - I'm good. SHE continued.
How do you do that? ME asked.
Do what? SHE
Be so cool about everything? ME
I am not cool about everything. You have no idea what my inner struggles are - all of them were bordering crazy. SHE
And yet you don't snap. ME
Because I'm a mother - it's that simple. I have my kids to think of. SHE said.
Look, it's just the validation that I'm still recognized as the wife - that's really what I aim for. Yung para lang alam mo kung san ka lulugar - sa lahat kasi ng ayaw ko eh yung binabastos yung karapatan ko bilang asawa pa rin. SHE
F*ck my husband all you want pero don't you dare attack my personality or tell me that I am not enough for my husband. Eh anu kung mas maganda regalo ni HE sayo? O mas mahal? O mas marami? Really, I can buy what I want and if that entices you to have s*x with HE or makes you feel that you're more loved, go ahead and think that. I will not rain on your parade. SHE added.
And that applied to ME when HE and ME were together pa? ME finally said.
Oo naman - why should you be an exception? SHE laughed.. Pero we both know that we passed that and moved into a more mature - if not meaningful - co-existence. You knew your place Kaloy, nobody had told you what to do or how to act but you carried yourself very well. SHE
That's the alcohol talking na ata. ME laughed.
No! Alam mo, gusto ko i-refer sa'yo si J para maturuan mo. J is clearly an amateur on the whole dynamics of being the third wheel. SHE
Don't say bad words! ME said.
We both laughed.
I hate it. SHE
That HE is gay - your gay. SHE
I think I am going to be perpetually attracted to you gay men. SHE
Loka - why would you be attracted to me. ME
No! Tumigil ka - you just had too many vodka. ME was screaming.
You haven't done it before with a girl di ba? SHE said, looking straight at me.
I swear I'm gonna scream RAPE! ME said.
SHE stood up.
ME stood up.
SHE move towards ME.
ME ran straight to the balcony and locked the door.
Ayan na ako. SHE teased.
NO! RAPE! Go away! ME said laughing.
Hindi na, I'm going to behave na. SHE
You promise? ME
ME let go of the door.
I have never seen this side of you! ME managed to say in between laughs.
Now I know how to make you run. SHE was laughing too.
We both sat on the balcony floor.
Thank you. ME said while staring at the skies. I haven't laughed this heartily until now.
SHE reached for my hand and squeezed it.
ME squeezed it back.