I envy that you still feel that. SHE
Feel what? ME
That excruciating squeeze in your heart when someone hurts you. SHE replied.
ME was at SHE's over the weekend. We were supposed to attempt to make home-made ensaymada but ended up folding the laundry instead.
I wish I didn't. ME said.
Don't say that. You're lucky you know. SHE
Expound. ME challenged SHE
To feel the pain is a gift. At least that's how I see it. It's a gift because that sprang from a special place. It means you still love with a heart that's not been numbed by all the previous hurt you had to go through. Or that you have such a big heart that all the scars could not possibly cover the enormity of your heart's size. It means you're human and you're living. And that you can still love like nothing matters - like you can still lose the world for someone. SHE said with a hint of longing in her voice.
ME just looked at SHE.
SHE looked back. In her eyes was genuine envy.
I had this somewhere in my draft files from last year. The "hurt" was from being lied to and giving that person a chance to say the truth but lied anyway.