At the Losing End...

*This is an extract from my conversations with Dok. Dok has been a long-time friend but its only quite recently again that we have had the chances to talk about our lives in general.

-o0o-

Love, like most sport, is a game. And in any game someone always takes the first place and the second. And in cases where there's a tie or a draw - a rematch must be had.

Here's how'd you know if you're at the loosing end:

1. You wake up ahead of his "good morning" texts. And you get paranoid when its 8 AM already and no text still. Not too mention, you over-analyze when that text arrives at 7 AM instead of the usual 6 AM.

2. You have the last text in a conversation.

3. He doesn't throw your questions back.

4. You try to make a conversation just out of an "okay" reply.

5. Your gifts are well-thought of. His' however, even have the price tag on and the dedication card is not even signed.

6. You believe everything he says:

                       "Oh, ang bilis nmn maubos ng lube mo" ME

                       "Konti lang naman talaga laman niyan" Him

7. You backtrack your conversation because suddenly he fails to call you "mahal ko" or "kaloy ko" or "mahal kong kaloy." Sa isip mo, ikaw yung may maling nagawa lagi.

Now that you know - would you still fight for it? Would you fight a battle that you'd know you'd lose?

I know I am.

Like I know I'll always be at the losing end.

Pity party galore!

LOL!

And here's the perfect song to cap it off:


     So don't say you're sorry
    You've only this much love to give
    You see, however much love's enough for me

-o0o-

PS: Gawd! I'm still ranting about same old problems, same old insecurities and the same old paranoia. When will this end? Kalowka!