Often, we read that we all only have three great loves in our lifetime.
I think I had those three.
The first one, lives up to the craziness of what you see in movies and read in stories. Its the butterfly-in-your-stomach kind of love. But it also makes you a psychotic b*tch because you can’t really edit the bad stuff in real life can you? It basically destroys all ideas you have on what love and relationships are. You learn from this kind of love and this sets the standard for you.
The second one, learning from the first, is more calculated. You come to think of it as a game: you can’t give more than what he does. Because you don’t want to lose as much as you did the first time.This is selfish and unfair and it makes you bad. And it’s going to be too late when you realise this and you end up losing more anyway.
The third one is unexpected. He is the complete opposite of everything you are. And you bask at how comforting it is to find someone totally different from you but gives you security and waits for you. You fight for this love. You are humbled by this love. But then, you find out, neither of you is growing - going nowhere. And that you can’t really depend on each other, which, is the whole point.
Those are my three.
What they don’t tell us is that the third one may not even last at all. That in the end, you end up alone - single like when you started.
It got me thinking: is three all we ever get?
And if the third doesn’t work out what are you left with?
Baka yun na yon. You only get three and if none of it work, waley na.
Parang okay na din ako dun - okay na yung tatlo. Hindi na din naman kaya ng puso at isip ko pa.
Siguro nga, I’m destined to live my life alone. And it ain’t so bad - I hope. Empowered naman ako. Highly independent. Kaya ko.
Pero yeah, I’m done with the whole relationship thing.
Okay na din naman ako.