Monday, January 9, 2012

I thought...

...I was okay - but i'm not.

My heart crumbles everyday - like it was being deprived of air.

I can't bear it.

I started sleeping on the couch so I wouldn't be reminded of the empty space beside my bed - but the bed's still there...

I rid of all your things but then, I open the freezer and your bacon and SML and leche flan are there.

Every inch of me screams you and I can't muster enough energy anymore to pretend  to be okay.

I'm a mess.
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10 comments:

  1. GuyronyJanuary 10, 2012 at 6:13 AM

    Then do what you must to fix yourself. It may take time Kaloy.

    No one said moving on is easy.

    But you know it's for the best...

    ReplyDelete
  2. gillboardJanuary 10, 2012 at 7:40 AM

    *hugs*

    it's all i can offer for now. :(

    ReplyDelete
  3. KaneJanuary 10, 2012 at 5:04 PM

    Ang hirap Kaloy no? As in. It's all I now. No more He and I.

    Kane

    ReplyDelete
  4. AnonymousJanuary 10, 2012 at 10:41 PM

    Kaloy, the New Year ushers new beginnings and changes we have to embrace...be brave, the storm will pass and dont you forget that you can run to Him, talk to Him and ask Him to give you light...

    It ain't easy :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Jpy DeeJanuary 11, 2012 at 12:12 AM

    lahat ng bagay may katapusan. kung nag end ang relationship mo with him, don't worry, mageend din ang sakti na yan soon. AKAAAAAPPP!! :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. Kryptonite UserJanuary 11, 2012 at 4:08 AM

    K? Dagdagan mo kaya problema mo? hehehe! I mean why don't you get something to distract you like a pet maybe or a masteral degree (a second one if you already have one) or .. You get my drift right? You gotta make yourself so busy that you won't even have time to think about .... uy! Happy New Year pala and Happy Three Kings! hehehe!

    ReplyDelete
  7. citybuoyJanuary 17, 2012 at 11:40 AM

    gasgas na pero it's all i have. *huuuugggsss* channel it into your art. may makuha ka man lang after all of that.

    ReplyDelete
  8. kaloyJanuary 31, 2012 at 3:27 AM

    k Guyrony: i wish we knew what we had to do to move on...

    k gillboard: it is more than i can ask...

    k Kane: yeah - hirap is a subtle description...

    k ortigaswanderer: i will - we are a little estranged but i will...

    k Jpy Dee: oo nga eh - everything ends... i wish it won't but that ain't enough...

    k Kryptonite User: i will take that suggestion to heart...

    k citybuoy: will do...

    *Thank you everyone for the kind words and warm thoughts. I read them everytime i have the urge to do something stupid. Really - thank you.

    ReplyDelete
  9. AnonymousFebruary 9, 2012 at 9:04 AM

    I just want to add to these inspiring messages of comfort. I must say I can totally relate. May I just say, prayer really does wonders. I don't know what else I could tell you that you didn't already know except to re-affirm my belief in you as a very smart person who is totally in-charge of his life's choices. The road to moving on is paved with hardships. It may not be easy, but you will get there eventually. May God bless and keep you safe. :)

    ReplyDelete
  10. kaloyFebruary 26, 2012 at 6:02 AM

    k Anonymous: Thank you. Sometimes I wonder how you - everybody's - message could transcend my computer monitor and just hit me right where i need it to hit... Salamat.

    ReplyDelete

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