Same Pain (If Not Worse)...

Akong pupunta. SHE

I was quiet.

Alam ko yung lugar, may project kami dun. Leave things to me. SHE continued

You can't. I said in a cracked voice.

Anong I can't? Kilala kita - this is killing you. SHE was angry

-o0o-

Buntis ako. The text read.

I mistook N's phone for mine. I took out an extension of my mobile plan for N so he doesn't have to worry about load.

Pag tinanong niya sabihin mo bigay na incentive sa trabaho mo. I remember telling N

Uwi ka agad kung pwde - samahan mo ako sa doktor. The text further said.

I quickly deleted it.

-o0o-

The thud in the door was unbearable.

What was it? 3:00 am? Who in the hell?

You don't pick up the phone for ages. You suddenly ignore everyone. Ano 'to?! Ha?! You don't care na others worry about you?! SHE was shouting and she was not even inside the house.

I looked at SHE and left the door open for her.

I took the bottle of beer that's already open and took a jug.

SHE seated beside me. A bottle of beer already open in her hand.

Talk to me. SHE

-o0o-

Wala naman akong tinago ah! Alam mo lahat! Ikaw pa nga yung nagsabi di ba? Sinabi mong huwag ko siyang hihiwalayan? N was talking at the top of his voice.

Marinig ka ng mga nasa kabilang unit. I said through my teeth.

Eh ano to? N was pointing at the bag of his clothes on the table.

Hindi ko pala kaya. I replied.

Gago ka ba?! N was shouting.

I just looked at N.

Wala akong tinago. Alam mo lahat. Di ba yun naman gusto mo?! Hindi mo na kaya?! Eh gago ka pala eh - sabi ko naman iiwan ko na siya. N continued

Buntis siya. I said softly.

-o0o-

Ang bata niya. SHE started.

And she's struggling. With the pregnancy and all. SHE was slow at talking - trying to find words that would be appropriate.

But you know all these already. SHE was squeezing my hand.

What to do now? SHE asked softly.

I was quiet.

-o0o-

I don't know what I was thinking.

That they're not having s*x while they're together?

Did I expect N to be at least that faithful?

Alam ko naman N was in a common-law relationship. That N was in the Metro for work to sustain his family - N had one kid then.

And it should have not come as a surprise since he was with her on most weekends.

-o0o-

I'll talk with the OB I know dun- she'll take care of her at least until she gives birth. SHE

I just kept looking at the bottle of beer.

Until then, you should stay with us. SHE offered.

I was still quiet.

Time to start picking up the pieces again. This is what we do. And what we have done. SHE

I was the fighting tears.

Tapos na. Tapos na 'to. SHE put me in a tight embrace and I just cried my heart out.

-o0o-

Kailangan ka niya. ME

N was was quiet now.

Andiyan na lahat ng kailangan mo. Mas makakabuti sa kanya kung dun ka muna. ME added

Babalik ba ako? N asked

ME was quite.

Tapos na. Tapos na 'to. ME mustered to say.