Friday, March 19, 2010

The BIRTHDAY Clause...

"I'l call you when I can - " It was He who texted.

I didn't reply.

I didn't know what to reply.

Hindi ko alam kung pagmumurahin ko ba yung gago o ignore ko na lang and move on to the next wrong guy...

But I kept on thinking how casual it was for She and He. She didn't have a bit of surprise or anger in her voice when I picked her call - she was monotone to say the least. And He acted like it was just another day in the office. And I - I was just plain LOST. At that moment, I wished I knew what was going on in their heads. Super Twilight Zone moment ko yun.

Alam mo yung feeling ng white plastic bag na nasa kalye na palutang-lutang lang dahil sa buga ng mga usok ng tricycle? Yung parang sa American Beauty. Parang ganun yung nararamdamn ko nun - I was floating in nothingness.

THREE days after -

He calling...


He calling...


He calling...


"Hey - kamusta?" It was He who spoke first.

"You at work?" It was He again...

"Yup." It was me - finally.

Naisip ko, kung kaswal lang sa kanya - eh dapat, kaswal din lng sa akin. I'm going to play his game and I won't be left to lose this time... Or so I thought.

"Daanan kita mga 7, kain tayo." He

"Won't be out til 9 later." I

"Hintayin kita." He

"Ikaw bahala." I

"Okay. See you mamaya. Bye." He

What the ef* am I getting myself into? Jusko! Lord have mercy! Those were the first thoughts that entered my mind the moment I put my phone down. Wala na naman kasiguraduhan 'tong gagawin ko - at alam na alam kong sa bandang huli ako pa rin ang talo. Ang pangit ng outlook ko sa pakikipagrelasyon kung tutuusin - kasi para sa akin laro ito na may nananalo at natatalo. At sawa na akong matalo.

It was 9 - He was there finishing a bottle of 7 Up.

"Bahay mo na lang tayo - namalengke na ako" He

"Nagpaalam ka ba?" I

"Maya na yang issues mo Kuya Boy - luto muna tayo saka kain" He

He bought a pack of Bacon, a kilo of Rice, cream soup and a litro of orange Tang.

Halfway into the orange Tang...

"I'm married for four years now and I have twins." He started in the most casual manner. "And my marriage with She was more for convenience than anything - i got her pregnant at sa mata ng mga magulang namin, dapat may kasalan. Don't get us wrong..." He was now speaking for She also. "We respect the sanctity of marriage that's why we're still living together as a family. Pero alam din namin magpakatotoo sa mga sarili namin. I love my twins and She - pero selfish din ako. Alam kong may hinahanap pa ako..."


"And if there's one agreement that we are religious about - its Birthdays. Mine, She's and the Twin's birthdays are for the family. Korny I know, but its the one condition She asks of Me and I have had no problem with it -- so far. My sabit ako - that's the hard fact - and I've laid it on the table - you do to it what you wish." He finished.

I drank what was left of the Tang litro as if it were my last and then...

"So... you like bacon?" I said.

He grinned and all my defenses fell down.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Na Naman...

ILANG beses ko na bang sinabing "TAMA NA?" Ilang beses ko na din bang sinabing "LAST NA TO TALAGA?" Kung Hindu god siguro ako, kailangan ko pang magpatubo ng isa pang set ng tig-four arms sa kanan at kaliwa kong balakang para lang mabilang kung ilang beses na akong umayaw sa sitwasyon ko.

FRIDAY ng gabi, nag-stock na ako ng Chocomani saka Bacon kasi weekend na naman. At pag weekend I know that it's mine - akin ang weekend mo. We were finishing our Love Boat marathon - finally... But halfway between putting the bacon in the fridge and munching on an apple, I remembered - its her birthday the next day... She's 31.

MATAGAL na nating usapan sa kontrata na bawal ang kaartehan ko kung birthday niya. Na yung bisperas, araw at post-bday date ay kay She at kay She at kay She lang. In short, i have to be nonexistent for three days at least - this I know I OWE She.

IT was five years ago, and it was your first time to sleep over. It was high-time sabi ko sa sarili ko. We've been seeing each other for 6 months already at isa pa nauso nun yung mga hidden videos sa motel so sa bahay na lang kasi mahirap na... I remember the exact position we have comfortably fit ourselves into - my right ear on your chest, just above your heart and your hands lingering on my hair. It was perfect - just the sound of your heart beating to my breathing gets me high the most. That was until...

"Is He with you?" it was a girl - I picked his phone up because the screen flashed "Boss calling..."

"Who's this?" I replied.

"Its She - ..."


"Look," She started, "its not the first time. You're not the first. I may not be okay with this set-up but it works for He and me. And I have nothing against..."

HE snatched the phone.

MY head was hearing drums the size of Araneta Colosseum and I literally froze.

All I heard from He was "Okay - I'm coming home."

ETO na naman ako. Yung ang una kong inisip. Heto na naman ako falling for the wrong guy. The few relationships I have had suddenly flashed before my eyes and then I saw my future - a constant choosing of the wrong guy...

"We could skip whatever you have to say. Just leave" It was I speaking.

He picked his trousers up, put his t-shirt on, and then his shoes and then kissed my head...

"You and I - we'll be okay..." It was He.

I heard the door close.